Bonebreak

Place of Birth: Tittybong, Australia

Age: 4

Occupation: PHP Ninja

What He Drives on the Street: 1961 Amphicar

His Dream Car: 1981 Taurus

Fastest Short Track Lap: 10.46

Fastest Long Track Lap: 14.50

Career: 2009 Rookie of the Year

Drivers Prepare for 2011 Season (Part 6 – Bonebreak)

Many of the Shake n Bake drivers are reclusive, but, none more so than Bonebreak.  I was only granted an interview if I agreed to do it via web conference at 3:30 in the morning, just before his bedtime.

Editor: “Has winning 2009 Rookie of the Year changed you in any way?”

Bonebreak: “I can say without a doubt that it has not.  I am still the same person. I refuse to buy ridiculous things like my fellow racers.”

Editor: “Have you always had that massive collection of Faberge Eggs I can see behind you?”

Bonebreak: “Uhhh, yes. Yes I have.”

Editor: “Alrighty then.  I have to ask, you insisted on this being a web conference. It’s 3:30 in the morning here in my hotel. Where are you?”

Bonebreak: “I believe I am in the same hotel as you.”

Editor: “Why am I not surprised?  More importantly, why do you have your egg collection with you in your hotel?”

Bonebreak: “I never go anywhere without my precious Faberge’s. They keep me grounded.”

Editor: “Let’s move on to your race season preparations.  What’s on your daily agenda to prepare for racing in 2011?”

Bonebreak: “I have a progressive schedule that is comprised of visualization.  Meaning, I start in February spending 1 hr per day sitting in solitude visualizing lap after lap, each one being a faster lap time. I increase my visualization time by 10 minutes each day until the first race of the season.”

Editor: “Sounds very intense.”

Bonebreak: “It is. If the first race doesn’t happen until the end of April, then it pretty much consumes my entire existence.”

Editor: “That sounds fairly reasonable especially when compared to what the other drivers do.”

Bonebreak: “Did I mention that I had my visualization space decorated in rare works of art?”

Editor: “No. Do you have any artist preferences?”

Bonebreak: “My preference isn’t any one particular artist. I do insist on a specific media.”

Editor: “Like oils, water colors or etchings?”

Bonebreak: “Velvet.”

Editor: “And there it is.”

Bonebreak: “I find that media really speaks to me. I will literally buy anything on velvet.”

(an alarm sounds in the background)

Editor: “What’s that?”

Bonebreak: “A calendar reminder.”

Editor: “Do we need to conclude the interview?”

Bonebreak: “Yes, it’s time to clip the toenails on my left foot.”

Editor: “Just your left?”

Bonebreak: “Everyone knows you don’t clip toenails on your right foot until a full moon.”

Editor: “Of course. Good luck in 2011.”

After the interview concluded, I found myself thankful that it was a web conference.  With the simple click of a button and I was back to the normal world.  Perhaps I can finish out this interview series via web conference.  One could only be so lucky.

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